Paperback observations.

Why do authors write books with pen names if they reveal their real names in the book itself? I really don’t get it! Sometimes you don’t even have to flip open the book to find out that it was written under a pen name- you can read it on the cover itself! I don’t know why, but it bothers me.

Why do women on trains wrap up their romance novels? Seriously, I’ve seen countless women on trains reading novels that have their covers wrapped with some fancy wrapping paper. They can’t fool me!

I just thought to myself- what do covers of romance novels look like? A half-naked man standing with their sculpted bodies glistening in the sunlight and a women (sometimes topless with her long hair draped over her nipples) all over him. Now I realize why women wrap up their novels.

But fantasy books have similar covers too- you get big breasted half naked women fighting dragons, but you don’t see them covering their books. I guess fantasy readers are proud to be caught reading such books. Haha.

I started (well, to be more accurate I tried) reading Shakespeare the other day, and man it was HARD! More than half the time I was referring to a dictionary to look up the meaning of some words, and most of the time I’m looking up the meaning of obsolete words which aren’t even used anymore in modern English. I thought it could help inspire me with my writing or something, but it feels like it’s more trouble than its worth. But I’m not giving up.. yet! Who knows? I might get the hang of it soon.

Random handphone notes.

You know what, I think there’s a nudist inside me. When I know I’m home alone, I walk around the house naked before I enter the shower. I have no idea why I do it, but I do.

Fuel is too cheap in Malaysia. What? Yes that’s right. Why do I say such things? Look at how many mat rempits there are on the road. Imagine if fuel cost rm10/liter. Would people still be throwing money away like that? Exactly.They wouldn’t even be able to afford it. We’d see less souped up Protons on the streets. It would rid KL of at least half it’s eye/ear sores inducing pollution. Leave racing to people in super cars with money, and on the race track.

People who get off elevators on the wrong floor are funny. Today, I was waiting for the lift to go down to the first floor, when it arrived and out rushed a lady. She took a few steps, looked left and realized she was on the wrong floor and came back in. I mean come on, she traveled down maybe two floors (I assumed she came in about two floors above me, cos the lights indicated a pause on that floor) and rushed out. If an elevator went that fast I’d be afraid.

I checked my blog stats (haven’t done that in awhile) and I noticed I still get the same amount of hits on my blog even though I don’t update as frequent as before. Who are these people?! Checking out my blog everyday for updates -_- I will try to write more. It helps keep my English in check as well. I think.

Still alive and kicking.

I haven’t written anything here in ages. Since I got a few minutes before the next DotA match starts, I decided to write something here. Anyway, I’ve been busy with work, going out and moving homes.

I think I got a gig coming up next week at urban attic at the acoustic showdown finals. Haha. Apparently last season’s winners are supposed to play so.. I should be there! Haha. I’ll keep my facebook updated.

Semalat Malam

So I took a cab home from the LRT station last night(my car’s still at the workshop) and I decided to strike up a conversation with the cab driver. For lack of something better to do. I figured the worst thing that could happen is I learn some new malay words right?

He was a nice driver and we talked about a few different topics on the short drive back. One thing I learnt from him was that running on gas saves alot of money. He told me that RM8 of gas could get him to LCCT airport and back to kl. I had no idea you saved that much. Spend 3-3.5k, get NGV installed in your car and you won’t regret it! (He spoke in malay of course).

When I reached my condo (safely), I paid him and as I got out of the car, I thought I’d wish him a goodnight, and so I said ‘Semalat Malam’. I think he didn’t hear me properly, but he returned the greeting and I got out of the car. After walking a few meters I realized what I had said to him. Semalat Malam. HAHA.

I chuckled to myself and walked up the stairs to my unit.

Don’t make this easy, I want you to mean it.. Jasey

Do you ever notice that when somebody tells you- “don’t think about it”, you almost instantly think about it? Telling someone to not think about something has the opposite effect.

Do you notice when people tell you to think about something, you rarely do?

The mind works in funny ways.

A license to drive is as good as a license to kill. Seriously, sitting behind the wheel of a car, you can decide the fate of other people around you. Inside and outside your car.

Whoever said our lives were dictated by lines on the road?

B-b-b-b-back!

After almost 2 months, my internet is finally working again!

Spent the last few nights just downloading stuff and playing dota and basically abusing my internet haha. Finally I’m taking the time to sit down and blog. And my hand phone is running out of space to store messages, so I shall start by writing those.

I just realized that local movies can’t show couples cheating. lol

I don’t know how true this is, but I’m pretty sure local movies with muslim characters can’t be shown cheating cos its wrong? Like how you can’t show them eating pork or drinking.. I don’t know. Just a random thought. haha

I realized how flawed the statement “You weren’t hungry a minute ago!” is

You know when you guys are on a long journey and a few people decide to eat at a rest stop, and you don’t eat cos you’re not hungry. But then about 10 minutes after you leave, you feel hungry, and people say that to you? And then you feel bad cos you think to yourself “I should have eaten with them!”. Think about it again- how do you know when you are going to get hungry or how long you’ll stay full? There’s no meter or gauge that you can read to tell you the status of your stomach! And what if ‘a minute ago’ was the point just before you turned hungry again? Exactly.

Today the lrt said bangsar just before we reached kl central (lrt was going towards kelana jaya, so central was first). I don’t know how often these errors happen, but it was pretty cool. When it was going to bangsar from kl central, it didn’t say anything, and it went back on track after bangsar. Maybe I experienced a once in a life time thing. Or maybe it was a warning from God, and that I should have gotten off one stop earlier.

Maybe I missed the turning point of my life. What is the turning point in someone’s life anyway? Isn’t every decision someone makes a turning point in their life? Every single decision from the tiniest ones like putting out a cigarette properly to big ones like deciding to drive after drinking alot of alcohol- it all affects your life. In the short or long run, everything has consequences.

How has life been? Well, besides the usual (work etc) I’ve been pretty much annoying everyone in the office to death playing my new song on the guitar everyday for the past week. I’m still working on the lyrics and music..will probably try it out at my next performance (don’t know when that is yet). And I can’t wait for you guys to hear it 😀 as for the EP, I’ll probably have to delay it til next month or later (due to financial issues..any sponsors out there? lol). In the meantime I’m still doing shows (anybody needs an acoustic solo act who does originals, please contact me!) and writing.

Anyways, its great to be back online 😀

I’m okay

Just in case you guys heard about the whole BA landslide thing and wondered if I died, I’m still alive and kicking *awww*

It started off with a crazy Friday night where I drank till I time travelled to Saturday morning. Got out of bed, packed my shit and trekked through some jungle to get out of the god-forsaken hill.

Anyways, to cut the story short, I won’t be home for the next few days (possibly weeks if they don’t clear the road by then). In the mean time I’ll sneak online once in awhile in between dota games at cafes and facebook from my phone. lol

Bolt is awesome. Go watch it! You don’t really have to watch it in 3D to enjoy it, there isn’t much difference between both versions. The value of the show is in the storyline and jokes. And of course not forgetting the amazing animation. Horton, Bolt and Madagascar, all top contenders for animated movie of the year in my list. Speaking of lists, I should come up with a top ten list for the end of the year and some new year’s resolutions. Maybe next year will be the year I accomplish them :p

Why people don’t hold the poles in trains.

So this post was supposed to be accompanied by a drawing of an old lady with sagging tits sandwiching the metal pole, but I couldn’t come up with anything as tasteful as circus granny (lol)

Anyway, I just had a thought about why some people don’t hold onto the pole on the trains- maybe they’re afraid of the things the pole has come into contact with before. Then I started thinking about what could touch those poles, and instantly the idea of a grandma came to my head. I swear, I don’t know why. Haha

How about the butt cheeks of some over sized person or just someone with dirty hands?

Cleanest part of the LRT to hold on to? Probably the ceiling of the train. Though not everybody is tall enough to reach it comfortably.

Okay this post was a pointless introduction to the promotion of my next performance:

Doppelganger 23rd November 2008
8.30-12am
RM20 per entry (you get one drink)
Marketplace KL

Main acts:
– Mei Chern
– Markiza & Peter Hassan Brown
– Benchmarx
– Jasmine Low

click here for the official flyer

I’ll playing the open mic spot 😀 so come and watch!

Smart Phones

So the other day I was thinking to myself. Hell, I’m always thinking to myself when I’m driving in the car and I’m stuck in a traffic jam.

But anyways, the reason I was stuck in the jam was cos my touch n go card was out of credit. Normally I’d be cruising past tolls on the smart TAG lane.

So I’ve thought to myself before- why doesn’t everyone invest in a smart TAG gadget? Yes it is pricey, but for the amount of money (from burning fuel when your car is idling in the jam) and time you save with it, it is worth every sen! Coming from a smart TAG user, you don’t know how many times I’ve said ‘boy am I glad I have smart TAG!’ the ridiculous amount of traffic you can beat is incredible. Think of it as a long term investment. No, this isn’t an advertorial. (LOL)

Anyways, smart TAG wasn’t supposed to be the main topic of my post, the main point of my post was supposed to be this note I saved on my phone:

“Phones should act as smart tags”.

See, when you’re stuck in the jam, you think of all these strange things. I was thinking about how to solve the problem of traffic jams at tolls. And I came up with 2 answers- abolish all tolls (obviously unreasonable lol) or make smart TAG free. So everybody would be using it and there wouldn’t be anymore toll traffic. But then again, it would be hard to make all these lazy people get off their asses to collect their free gadgets, so why not make phones have the capabilities to act as smart TAGs?

People would enable blue tooth or something on their phone, and when they drive by the toll, the fare would just be deducted from their credit or added to their phone bill! Haha, maybe it isn’t technically possible at this point in time, but I’m sure as technology develops, such an idea becomes viable.

Minister of transportation? Fo sho! lol

Cabs of the future.

So the other day I got in a cab, and realized that the cab in front of me was going to the same place as well. Then I thought to myself- wasn’t that a huge waste of petrol and money? If only I knew the person in front, we could have shared the cab, the costs, and the cab driver would’ve saved petrol, and hence saved the environment.

But because we were strangers, we didn’t get on the same cab.

So in the car I started thinking to myself about cabs in the future. Maybe in the future, there would be a sign on top of the cab that displays its destination, via which route, and how many more passengers it can carry. And people who were going to the same place can flag the cab down and join the ride. The meter would calculate when the second person got on and split the remainder of the distance with the new guy and so on.

This would solve problems with not enough taxis going around, encourage carpooling, and who knows, even create relationships between strangers!

Anybody wanna vote me into parliament for ministry of transport?
Fuck me, I’m just babbling lol.