Dear Doctor

Spending time in a hospital sucks. Unless you’re there for the birth of a child (assuming it isn’t the spawn of Satan), it’s never pleasant. You sit on a chair or stand against a wall, staring wordlessly at the patient you’re visiting, hoping that somehow, some way, a miracle happens, getting rid of all the ailments he/she is suffering from. That’s never the case.

It’s a lot of waiting. Waiting to check in. Waiting for their condition to stabilize. Waiting for results of a test. Waiting for doctors to arrive. Waiting for their verdict. Waiting to see if the medication works. Waiting to find out if the patient is ready to go home. The worst part about it? There’s nothing you can do about it. Everything is out of your hands.

It’s like playing the lottery. You just pay money and hope for the best. That’s the thing about humans. No human is alike. Not everybody works according to the text-book. There’s no manual for each person. Some people respond differently. Some people show different symptoms. There’s a million different variables determining what the issue and solution is.

We’re not computers. Two beeps during POST – RAM error. Try reseating it or replacing the RAM sticks. Mouse not working? Try plugging it in again, or changing the battery. There are limited outcomes when it comes to machines, which makes troubleshooting easy.

I’d like to believe that doctors are always trying their best to solve the situation. That everything they do is beneficial to their patients, and that they’d like to get them discharged as soon as possible. And that it’s not some scheme to make money for the hospital by keeping them in their bed for as long as they can.

Dear doctor, I know you won’t be reading this post, but I trust you and your abilities to do what’s best for her. Because, let’s face it – I know shit about what’s going on, only that it hurts and it’s life-threatening. Despite the nagging I get from time to time, I’d rather have her home than wasting away in a hospital bed. She’s the strongest woman I know and wouldn’t be there if she had a choice, but this time, things are out of her hands.

I don’t think I’m ready to lose her yet. I doubt I’ll ever be ready.

I hope I’ll be able to bring her home soon.

A Book Affair

As part of my room decluttering exercise, I’ve unearthed a ton of books I don’t read anymore. Before I give them away, I’ve decided that I’m going to try to get some money for them first. So, in a couple of hours, I’ll be attending A Book Affair – a pop up book market which takes place every Wednesday and Sunday in Taman Desa. I’ve never attended any of these events before but it seems like a pretty cool event, and a great way to pass on the gift of reading (and fund future keycaps lul). Hopefully there will be plenty of people attending today’s sale!

This is only the first batch of books that I’ve found in my room, as I uncover more in the future, I’ll be sure to unload them at the sale.

So if you’re in the mood to buy secondhand books at cheap prices, feel free to drop by.

A Book Affair [Facebook]

Multipurpose hall, Desa Permai Condo, Jalan Morib, Taman Desa, 58100 Kuala Lumpur [Map]
2pm – 9pm

And I thought I was done selling books.

Word Vomit

I remember reading a writing tip a while ago – start off your day by vomiting out a page of words. I had forgotten about it until earlier today when I was feeling a bit stuck creatively. Out of the blue, the tip resurfaced and I decided to give it a shot. Because why not? It only takes a few minutes to do, and if it didn’t work, at least I could say I tried. I started Microsoft Word, and just started word vomiting. Initially there was a bit of resistance. It was challenging to find the words to say. So I decided to do what I do best – write about what I was doing.

So I wrote about writing, and suddenly, one sentence lead to another, and another, and another. I just kept going and going until I had slightly more than a page worth of words. It felt good. I don’t know how to explain it. A lot of it was repetition and nonsense, but at least I was putting words down. I wrote about everything and anything that came to mind. It was kinda therapeutic. It was like the page was my doctor listening to me spew nonsense.

Anyway, long story short – it helped. After I finished with my page of word vomit, I was unstuck. I could write much more freely and came up with a bunch of ideas for work. Not sure if it’s something I’ll do everyday (I wonder if it will lose effectiveness in the long run?), but it’s something new I have in my bag of tricks to revert to in the future.

(No, I’m not publishing today’s word vomit, it’s not worth anyone’s time.)


“I can’t wait to see her again.” He smiled to himself.

It had been two weeks since he had last seen her. She spent the summer break at her parents’ place out of state. So he had been looking forward to this day. He kept his feet on the gas pedal as he drove towards her house. Traffic was great this evening – it was smooth all the way. Less than ten minutes after leaving his house, he was at hers.

He saw her standing outside as he parked his car. He couldn’t wait to tell her all about what had happened during his break. Elated, he hopped out of his car and dashed towards her. She had finished smoking a cigarette and was putting out the butt with her flip-flops.

“Baby!” he greeted her, arms outstretched.

While she was only dressed in a casual T-shirt and shorts, she stood radiating like a goddess under the moon light. He couldn’t take his eyes off her.

A few paces from her, just out of arms reach, he saw the smile on her face straighten. Like a trampoline returning to its neutral state, it took the wind out from his step.

“I’ve put all your stuff in here,” she said as she handed him a paper bag. Then she turned and walked back into her house.

Writing Prompt from Reddit: Write either a genuinely nice story or a story that looks nice and then has an unexpected turn. Don’t let any people reading know which you wrote until the end.

Topre and Me

A couple of years ago if you told me that I’d be spending an exorbitant amount on keyboards, I would have told you that you were crazy. Well, fast forward to now and I eat my own words. Ever since I fell in love with the hobby (if you can even call it that – since I don’t assemble my own boards yet), I’ve been on the lookout for new keyboards to try out. Different layouts, sizes and switches.

However, one of the switches that I never had an opportunity to try were the polarizing Topre switches. There were a lot of people raving about them and on the other hand there were people saying that Topre switches were just expensive rubber domes. I had to find out for myself – but that was an impossible task since I didn’t have friends with Topre boards for me to try out and retail stores here didn’t carry them either. Fortunately, I had a friend in Japan last week and thanks to him, I have one of the most iconic 60% keyboards in existence – the HHKB Professional 2.

While I had never tried Topre before, I was a fan of the keyboard’s design and layout so that made it an easy buy for me. Also, I figured, if I wasn’t a fan of Topre I would have no problems reselling it on the secondhand market. Turns out, I don’t even need to consider that option because man, I’m in love with the switches. Tactility is different compared to the almost non-existent bump on MX Browns, and it’s at the top of the key press instead of midway. It feels great to type on – each keypress when bottoming out gives a nice, solid ‘thock’ that sounds like music to my ears.

In terms of aesthetics, the retro colorway and non-gamer Sans Serif font is perfect for such a timeless keyboard that hasn’t really changed since 1996. Despite it having a plastic shell, the keyboard feels extremely sturdy and is heavier than I expected.

The learning curve is pretty much zero, since I’m used to 60% boards and I’ve been using a similar layout for the past few months. My only real complaint with the keyboard is that my control key rattles more than I’d like it to. Other than that, I love the HHKB Pro 2 so far. It’s only my first day with the keyboard but I can see myself using it until it gives up on me (which hopefully won’t be any time soon!).